So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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