he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
i've created a new STD.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize