i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize
