Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
This house was built for laser tag.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
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