Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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