She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize
