its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
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