im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
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