their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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