i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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