Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Will exercising make me less horny?
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