fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
