He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
These tits shall not be calmed
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Randomize
