I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize
