IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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