The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
