Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
23 People Reveal The Worst Culture Shock They’ve Ever Experienced While Traveling
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment