all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
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