It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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