Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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