we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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