if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
