Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
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I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
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