Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize