singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Just cropdusted the office
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize
