It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
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