just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
