How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
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