the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
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