just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Randomize