And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Come share oat with me in your robe
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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