sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
i want to swaddle you in tequila
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize
