Where are you?
In a non slutty way
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
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