so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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