id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Randomize