We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
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