turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize