He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize
