Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
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