On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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