u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
A+ Viking dick
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
