he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
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