Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
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