question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
