i wish there were pregnant emoticons
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
Randomize
