apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Randomize
