Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
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