Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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