I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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