I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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