We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
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