Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
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